Malaise
by eely
Summary: Auruo is upset for a reason unknown. Modern AU


it was going to be some sad auruo/petra unrequited tears but i decided not to do that

xxx

"Doesn't look like you're doing very well."

Auruo looked up from his tea. He saw Petra standing there, holding her own cup, leaning against the wall. He looked back down.

"Nah, I'm alright." he told her. He wasn't completely lying, he wasn't even feeling that bad. He wasn't feeling that great either, but that didn't matter. It was a sort of lazy sadness feeling.

Petra blinked and raised her eyebrows. She wasn't really used to seeing him look sad, he mostly just looked angry. She never knew how to comfort him, though. She looked down at her own feet, and back to him.

"Um. Well, have a good day, then." she said.

"You too." he said, lazily waving at her. "Don't leave." he thought.

He watched her walk away, hoping she'd at least look back. She didn't.

He looked down at his feet. He set the tea down next to the couch he was on, and laid down on it. He might as well sleep off this ugly, sad feeling.

…

When he awoke, however, it was about Seven at night, and he was feeling worse than before. He picked up the tea next to the couch, which was cold, and had dust in it now, and carried it off with him. He'd dump it out when he got to the sink.

Sooner or later, he managed to drag himself all the way to the kitchen. He dumped the tea out onto one side and set the cup in the other.

He looked around the kitchen. He didn't feel like eating, he just felt like going back to sleep. Miraculously, he managed to grab himself an apple and eat it. He threw the core out, turned the lights off, and sat back down at the counter. He crossed his arms on top of it and put his head down. Sleeping should cure it this time, right?

…

"Nah. That didn't work." was one of his first thoughts upon waking up. He looked at the digital clock on the stove. It read 3:42. Obviously in the A.M.. He dragged himself off of the chair. "My ass hurts." he said aloud to no one. He didn't feel like sleeping anymore, even though he was still upset.

He sat down in a chair and turned on the TV. It was further away from the bedrooms, so Levi most likely wouldn't be woken up by it. He watched some celebrity news stuff that he had recorded, answering the "Why would you record that?" with a "Because I get bored sometimes." It wasn't until halfway through that he had begun to cry. He didn't realize it until a few minutes later, when he had begun to breath a little heavier. He wasn't sure why he was crying, but he decided to take advantage of the background noise to cover it up, and let himself whimper a little. He never really got to full-out sobbing, since he had to repress it as a kid, growing up with parents who yelled whenever he started to cry. It was a normal reflex to keep himself quiet if he cried at all.

He was glad the only lights on were the flashes from the TV, otherwise this would've been embarrassing. Having lights on made him feel like more people were around, even if they weren't. So he didn't mind having the lights off most of the time, unless he was reading. It was perfect for crying, though. He curled up in the chair and watched the TV sideways, still letting himself cry and try not to make any noise.

This was the type of crying that he liked. No pathetic sobbing or blubbering, something silent and quiet. This meant that he wasn't so weak to let himself make noises, which is sort of like a subconscious call for help. He didn't need any, he just needed to be by himself. Maybe there was one person who he'd like to be with, but she would most likely say things to comfort him that would only make him feel worse. Uplifting words from someone you love who most likely doesn't feel the same just doesn't feel like proper comfort. It'd be nice of her to try, though.

Eventually, the tears stopped coming and his breathing became regular again. His eyes hurt a little, but he didn't mind. He felt a little tired, but not the kind of tired that made him want to go to sleep. He sat up in the chair again and clicked another episode of some stupid celebrity gossip show.


End file.
